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The Lover and the Loved Spell

The goal of this love spell is to release any fear and pain held within the body and heart, and ultimately to open up your life and heart to love through renewed passion, vision, and positive, fulfilling relationships (in the form of both friends and lovers), all in the highest good for you and your path.

This spell is best performed on a Friday, the day of the week ruled by Venus, and during the waxing moon period - anytime from a new moon up until the full moon - as we hope for love to grow in our lives just as the moon grows in the sky.


What you will need:

  • A red candle. (One you can carve into a chime or tapered candle.)

  • A lighter.

  • An oil that evokes love for you, I recommend rose oil, or ylang ylang oil. (Or both!)

  • Sugar and a pinch of cinnamon on your prettiest plate. (Because balance is a good thing in a relationship—think sugar & spice!)

  • A piece of rough rose quartz with a point, or a clean kitchen knife. (For carving your candle.)

  • Optional but recommended - Rose petals. (Treat yourself and your spell to some beautiful flowers to celebrate your new life as the ultimate lover and intensely loved person you are!)

  • Sage for cleansing prior to spell or some sort of clearing object you’re familiar with.


Before you begin your spell:

  • Take a shower or wash your hands.

  • Get dressed up in your favorite outfit, something that makes you feel beautiful. (Couldn’t hurt to include something red in your choice, but any outfit will do as long as you love it! See the theme we have going here?) Take your time getting ready, as if it's for a date with Venus, Goddess of love herself. Notice what the outfit you choose may signify about the type of love you’re hoping to attract through this spell—is it that one dress that hugs you in all the best places, in hopes of attracting a love that’s spontaneous and exciting and gets you out and about? Is it your favorite comfy clothes or satin slip in hopes of attracting more friends or cuddle buddies to snuggle up on the couch with for movie night-at your place? Allow yourself to think about that perfect love as you pick through your closet, and let this outfit be symbolic of your place in that picture.

  • Clear aside a special place in your room or outside in nature to conduct your spell where you won’t be disturbed. (If you happen to live near the ocean or sea when this spell finds you, ignite your spell into action there for some extra Venus energy!)

  • Gather all your items and place them where you plan to conduct your spell. Have your spell handy.

  • Sage the area where you will do your spell (if you don’t have sage, visualize a cleansing white light covering you from your head to your toes and your entire surrounding space) to create a sacred shield of protection around you as you conduct you spell.

  • Say a prayer to your higher self and the universal life force energy—or if you’re comfortable, to your spirit guides, guardian angels, and any deities you resonate with—to guide you through your spell, hear you, and protect you. (Venus/Aphrodite, Goddess of love, and Archangel Chamuel for expanding the heart and attracting quality relationships, would be great to work with.)


Conducting your spell:

  • Take your red candle, and using your rough rose quartz (or kitchen knife) carve the words “I am love” and “I am loved” into your candle.

  • Now take your rose or ylang ylang oil and anoint your candle. 

  • Now that your candle is covered with oil, roll your candle in your sugar and cinnamon mixture. We use sugar so the new relationships we attract will be sweet, loving, and positive, with genuine people. The pinch of cinnamon adds depth. 

  • Put your candle down in its holder, or whatever you’ve chosen to catch any residual wax.

Using your rose petals, make a triangle around your candle. We want this love to consume our body, mind, and spirit.
Now light your candle.

Affirmation to be read aloud before you say your spell:

With this spell I choose to release any and all fear and pain that resides in my heart and body and holds me back from seeing, feeling, and experiencing the love that exists within me and within the world to find me and shower me in warmth, joy, heat, and laughter. With this spell I am awakened and see with new eyes the awe of my being, my body, and the earth that is home to me in this life. With open eyes I realize how charming people naturally find me, and with an open heart I attract and welcome quality genuine friendships and lovers who fill my life with light, laughter, and passion.

 

Now say the following spell aloud three times:

No pain or fear to hold me back,

Through love I see and feel and act.

Passion and laughter unburden my load.

My feet now walk this love-paved road.


End your spell with a closing “Amen,” or “And So It Is,” and know that the work has been done to welcome more love into your life and perspective.

Move your candle to a safe place or to your altar and allow it to continue burning to completion. 

(If you didn’t perform your spell at home, relight it once you get home so it can continue to burn.)

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